How do I end this relationship?

My girlfriend and I have been together about a year and a half. We've had a lot of rocky times where I've been certain it was the end, but the same thing always happens. I think about the situation too much, and I always end up seeing myself as a jerk, and her as innocent lovely ';jane doe';. Thats really not how it is though.





She has a lot of good qualities, and shes done a lot for me. I do love her, (how could I not, after all this time?) But I KNOW beyond a shadow of a doubt that we are not meant to be together. We have no real chemistry. Our personalities are opposites. She has many psychological issues and insecurities (as do I), that are VERY frequently causing us to argue and create a very negative climate. She loses control during arguments when I tell her to get a grip, she only freaks out more.





The point is I love her and I am worried how she is going to react when I tell her its over. Its hard to love someone and know you shouldn't be with them in that kind of relationship. I only want the best for her. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that she would take this break-up very hard and badly.





I love her and I have to leave her. What would be the least painful way for me to do this? And how could I ensure that she doesn't go stalker on me, and accepts the end of our relationship?





Thanks for any help.How do I end this relationship?
Well first and foremost, like you said, this is going to hurt her no matter how you give it to her. There is no easy or painless way. But what is most important is that YOU keep it together, if she starts going off, which is likely, you have to keep your cool. Remain calm and expect the unexpected. Sit her down and in a non-accusing, calm voice, tell her everything you said right here. And don;t give her any shred of hope that it could somehow be fixed, such as ';we can still be friends though';. To us, that sounds like a chance to start over fresh. Just leave it with how you feel, let her go off, tell her your sorry, and end the conversation.





Good luck.