End of my first love?Or just a hiccup?

Long term relationship coming to an end...or just the usual bumps and turns?


I dont really know what to do atm,Ive been with my boyfriendfor nearly 4 years now.Im 21 years old,we met as normal troubled teenagers and seeked solace in eachother,he helped me stop self harming and I stood by him as he discoverd love and all its complications.I had troubles at home(nothing horrendous just strict parents) and moved in with him after two years.Last year we got our own flat together.Things have never been ';perfect'; between us,but we seem to be progressing at a reasonable pace,we've had normal ups and downs and bigs up's and downs and we've changed alot.We've had our fair share of shouting matches,emotional heart to hearts and two minute break ups.Recently (past 6 months) my anger and thoughts has become more internel,he has a very low self esteem and is not motivated in getting his life on track,he works hard but at a job that isnt going anywhere.Ive tried and fails too many times now too getting him to try new thing (going back to college,writing Cv's)but every time it has felt like I was pushing him like a mother begs a child to do their homework.He's had alot to go through in his life and I dont expect these things to change,I just know that no matter how much I love him he cant be the father of my children with this mentalitly.In all other aspects of personailty there is hardly any problems,he has a slight disrespect for housework,and yes he does things I dont like but he offers so much love and affection and amazing dedication.


HOWever....and yes theres a but..


I started Uni in October,and recently changed over to a new course.We have started group work and I was instantly attracted to this one person in particular,I've never had a problem with this before,maybe a few crushes that have lasted...like 20 seconds but nothing that has make me reconsider my relationship like this before.This guy is attractive to me as a a person...and looks...alot %26gt;_%26lt;


He appears to be slightly into me too,he has a girlfriend of 3 months too aswell,though they appear not to be very serious.


My heart pumps when Im around him...i get giddy when we brush past eachother and looking into his eyes is making me mellllllt!


Also he's very clever and seems to work hard,he has the same intrests as me,which my boyfriend unfortuantly doesnt share.We have had good conversations and I enjoy being around him...even if it was a friend.


The problem is I don't know what to do,I love my boyfriend to bits,but it seems I want him to be someone that maybe he just isn't going to be...he also doesn't take much interest in my hobbies...and sometimes I feel he doesnt appreciate the real me....However even without being my boyfriend he is a true friend who i would never question betraying or lying to!


Soooo the question is what do I do?


I would really appreciate some honest answers,or some questions to help me out...favours will be returned :)


Thanks if you managed to read this all the way!End of my first love?Or just a hiccup?
What you shouldn't do is trespass on the other woman's boyfriend. What you shouldn't do is cheat on your boyfriend. What you should do is have a serious talk with your boyfriend about goals and roles and what to do to progress or give it up. Be honest in this relationship and don't get involved in another one until you settle this one. You'll feel better about yourself in the long run and your life will be healthier and happier.End of my first love?Or just a hiccup?
I agree with Willa. From reading what you wrote, it seems that maybe you should consider letting him go. If you're that interested/excited about someone else, it might mean it's time to move on. I've had mini crushes before (while with my current boyfriend of 6 years) but they've never lasted longer than a few seconds. I might be wrong, it's just what I got from what was written.