4.5 year relationship ended because I cheated..?

I am 28, he is 23. We met when he was 17 and I was 22. We hit it off immediately, fell in love within probably the first year and moved out of our parents houses and into our own apartment together. It was great. From there, we moved into a house together. That about 1.5 years into it, and I started to stray away from the relationship sexually. We broke up, and got back together. Broke up and got back together. We moved into a new house, and it still continued.





In 4.5 years we broke it off 5 times, and I guess this is exactly what I needed to have done to make me see what I have actually done and why and how I did it.





We have a lot of history together, October 2007 his mother died of a rare brain disorder and I was there for the entire process of her dying. It was hard on me, and omg was it really hard on him. I was at her bedside when she died with him and at the funeral, and casket picking and headstone picking etc...afterwards, we both visited her graveside together and shed some tears and hugs together. Anyways, we have a lot of history together.





He dated a guy for 4 months, who was allergic to everything under the sun…who lived an hour away from our home town. He cheated on him twice with me, which ultimately ended their relationship.


He is now dating a 22 year old flaming, convicted sex offender. They have been dating now for 7 months and he ‘loves’ him! 4.5 year first love relationship and now he loves someone after 7 months. Oh, did I mention they moved in together after 3 months!?


My ex got into a roll over accident the other day, I heard it on the police scanner and didn’t know what to do so I took my Mom to the hospital with me and the Chimo and his mother met us in the parking lot had security escort us away and I wasn’t allowed to see my ex – nor did I know if he was badly hurt. I was in tears – lots of them! My ex did text my sister after a few hours and was talking to her about how he is okay..just bruised. He also said to her “remind Ken to leave him be, he can’deal with me right now”…he keeps saying right now with everything..


The other night, I went to the local wine bar to have a glass or two of wine with an old friend..and my ex was there come to find out, alone..no boyfriend around..and as soon as I arrived..he left his FULL glass of wine sitting on the counter and left immediately and flew out of the parking lot..WHAT does this mean? Is he angry at me? Does he still have feelings for me and is just denying them?





Now, I'm sorry people. I have been told to move on move on move on...I am sorry, my heart is still there.





What do you believe he is thinking, going thru, wanting, etc..and where do you think I stand being with me for 4.5 years and loving me, and this convicted sex offender (and felon) of 7 months?





I thank you for your input!





Note: we are/were a gay couple.4.5 year relationship ended because I cheated..?
if you wanted to be with him, you wouldnt **** someone else4.5 year relationship ended because I cheated..?
move on. if you guys get back, can you face this person knowing you did wrong?
It's over. Cheating is cheating. Sometimes you can forgive. But repeatedly? Move on.